


Challenging Nature: A Look Into Male Lactation

by jaerie



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Body Modification, Breast Pumps, Breastfeeding, Communication, Lactation Kink, Light Bondage, M/M, Male Lactation, Milking, Nipple Licking, Nipple Play, Self Confidence Issues, light biting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-22
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2020-05-16 05:16:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19311382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaerie/pseuds/jaerie
Summary: Even taking into account all the bizarre things Harry has subjected himself to in the past for the sake of an article, Harry has received his strangest assignment yet.  It comes up as a random misunderstanding in a meeting and builds into a conversation — can men breastfeed?  Internet searches reveal documented cases of male lactation popping up at different times throughout history, but are any of them true?  Can a man will himself into lactating?  Harry has two months to make it happen.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I guess when I say "I'm just going to write a cute fun piece about this!" I actually mean "let me accidentally flesh this out into a more serious work over 10k". It is apparently my new normal.  
> Anyway. This piece is inspired and modeled after this article: [Milk Man: My Curious Quest to Breast-Feed](https://slate.com/technology/2011/05/male-lactation-can-a-33-year-old-guy-learn-to-breast-feed.html) about a man to sets out to see if he can induce lactation in order to write about it. For the record, this CAN be done however it is very rare that it is successful without a medical condition or taking hormones specifically to accomplish lactation. It technically CAN be done the way Harry has done it in this fic especially if there is a baby present in the equation, but again, super rare and requires a lot of dedication. (side note: if you read this guy's article, it was a VERY weak attempt to make it happen and he gave up really quick. he really wasn't seriously trying at all imo.) 
> 
> Enjoy this lactation kink, relationship building, unusual little fic.

* * *

 

 

Harry wasn’t sure how he always ended up in such ridiculous situations in life.  From landing his job at the clickbait news site — from writing stupid joke posts on his blog in college — to how he met his current boyfriend — knocking on his neighbor’s door to tell them to keep it down and being mistaken for a hired stripper for his now-boyfriend’s birthday just a month after said boyfriend’s gay awakening.

His whole adult life seemed to be one awkward situation after another, but out of all of them, Harry thought this might be at the top.  Standing in the lactation section of Buy Buy Baby alone on a Friday evening comparing the pros and cons of breast pumps, he wasn’t just a thoughtful friend looking for a baby shower gift.  No, Harry was shopping for himself.

The whole thing had started as many conversations in the brainstorming room do.  Someone throws out some outlandish claim they heard somewhere, the debate begins, and soon enough, an article is born.  

Friday afternoon’s session was no different.  

“Awww!  Look everyone!  My friend’s baby was just born!”

“The gay ones with the surrogate?”

“Why is he holding the baby shirtless in the hospital?”

“Skin to skin, that’s a thing.”

“What kind of thing?”

“Bonding thing.  Like with breastfeeding.”  

“They’re breastfeeding??”

“No, they’re both guys.”  

“Guys can lactate, you know.”  

“No they can’t.”

“Yes they can, look it up.”  

And that was how Harry ended up with an assignment, a challenge, and a small budget for the experiment.  His nipples were hard just thinking about how uncomfortable and weird the next two months were going to be.  

There hadn’t been much time to do any proper research, but he figured he needed to get started right away.  Plus, the women in his office with children kept stopping by his desk as the gossip of his new endeavor spread and he’d picked up enough helpful tips and recommendations to at least start with the basics.   

Stimulation seemed to be the key factor so a breast pump was a must.  The cheapest were manual pumps. With all the work that involved, he knew he would give up.  Instead he chose the cheapest double electric pump for a hundred bucks and clutched it to his chest while he stood overwhelmed by all the products staring back at him.  Since he wasn’t actually feeding a baby, all the extra features the other pumps boasted about didn’t seem very important. The other products though… Some of those might be helpful.  At the very least they might have a placebo effect.

Organic Milkmaid Tea felt like a good place to start and soon, his arms were loaded down with supplements and nutrition bars and about anything he thought might help.  He also made a mental note to stop by his health food store sometime over the weekend for their recommendations.

He headed up to the check out and only blushed and fumbled his words slightly when asked if he had a new baby back at home.  This whole experiment was going to be awkward.

 

—

 

“In the kitchen!” Harry called out when he heard Louis let himself into his apartment later that night.  They’d been dating for about nine months and, after the awkwardness of their initial meeting had faded, their relationship had been as natural as breathing.  Since Louis’ best friend Niall already lived next door, Harry had trusted Louis with his spare key much sooner than he would have with anyone else. It worked out well since sometimes Louis was at his restaurant late or had to be there early and Harry’s apartment was at least ten minutes closer than his own building.  

“I thought I was going to be stuck late again but then Jeff finally showed up.  Sorry I’m late.”

Louis passed where Harry was standing at the stove with a skillet and gave him a half-squeeze hello before sinking onto one of the barstools at the island.  

“That’s okay.  Just finishing up.  You hungry? I’m making omelettes.”  

“That sounds great, yeah,” Louis agreed eagerly.  

Harry turned to set the plated omelette down in front of him with a fork before turning to finish his own.  

“You have a baby shower coming up or something?” Louis mumbled with a full mouth followed by the crinkling of the plastic shopping bag.  

Harry shrugged and glanced over with the spatula in his hand.  “It’s for an article I have to start working on.”

“Reviewing breastfeeding products?  Top ten items your tits will die for?”

“Don’t call them that,” Harry tsked.

“Tits?”

“Stopppp!” Harry whined playfully, “It sounds crude, like bros objectifying women.”

Louis took another bite and pulled the pump out to look at it.  

“So what’s the article then?”

“To see if it’s possible for a man to lactate.”   

He said it nonchalantly, partially to try to normalize what he was about to do to himself.  Louis snorting out a laugh didn’t help.

“And you’re going to do that how?”

Harry came around with his own plate and sat beside him.  

“Stimulation and maybe some natural things that are supposed to help?”  Harry shrugged as he picked up one of the boxes of powerbars and squinted at the ingredients.  “Flaxseed and tumeric are in a lot of these? I guess that is supposed to help or something?”

“Wait, you’re being serious?” Louis set his fork down with his brows raised.  

“Yeah?  I don’t know if it will even work or not but the idea got pitched today and now I have a breast pump in my kitchen.”  

“Why?  Why would you even want to do that?”

Harry shrugged again and started to cut his omelette with his fork for something to do.  

“I guess I’m curious to see if it will work as well and… I guess… If it IS possible, maybe one day if we decide to have kids…”

“You’d want to breastfeed them??” Louis asked in surprise.  

“Well… maybe?  The bonding time is incredible and getting antibodies and stuff is supposed to be healthy… and… wait.  You aren’t bothered I just brought up having kids?”

Louis shrugged and then seemed to realize he hadn’t even flinched at the thought even if they weren’t even at the stage of living together yet.  “I’ve always wanted kids.”

A smile grew on Harry’s face while Louis stuffed another bite into his mouth.  

“Me too.”  

 

—

 

“So you’re really doing this, huh?” Louis asked as Harry sat on the couch unboxing his newly acquired breast pump.  

“Yeah, I guess?” Harry shrugged as he lined up the plastic pieces on the coffee table as he pulled them out.  “Even though I know it’s possible, I don’t _really_ think it’s going to work.  At the very least it will be a comical piece.  I’m going to do a journal about it and then an article at the end of a two month trial.”

“Two months?” Louis quirked a brow.  

“That’s how long they recommend for women who want to breastfeed adopted babies and stuff so that’s the timeframe we set.”  

“They can do that?”   

“Apparently?  Look it up or something.”

Fumbling with all the pieces, Harry couldn’t get them all to fit together as easily as the instructions made it look.  Louis initially just kept watching tv until he finally pushed Harry’s hands out of the way and sat down with the instructions.  Between the two of them, they eventually snapped everything together and the fully assembled pump sat waiting to be used.

“You ready?” Louis asked.  

“Why am I so nervous all of a sudden?” Harry rubbed his suddenly clammy palms against his jeans and fidgeted.  

“It’s not like milk is going to suddenly start shooting out or anything.”  

Louis picked up one of the small bottles attached to the suction cup and inspected it.  

“How many of these do you think women fill up at a time?”

“I don’t know Louis, is that relevant right now?”  

“Calm down, it’s not like you’re getting breast implants or something.”  

Louis chuckled and shook his head which helped break Harry’s sudden anxiety.  He pulled off his shirt and took a deep breath.

“Do I just…?” Harry picked up the other cup and pressed it over his nipple as he looked down.  

Louis picked up the instruction manual and read aloud once he’d skimmed through what they’d already done.  “Center the breastshields over the nipples and start pumping. Tip: it is important to be as comfortable and relaxed as possible when pumping.  Learning relaxation techniques may be helpful.”

Harry laughed as Louis fluffed a pillow behind him and then lifted his feet up onto the table.  

“Comfortable enough?” he asked with a grin and then plugged the ac adapter into the nearest powerstrip.  

Harry held both cups centered over his nipples and Louis pressed the power button.  

“Here goes nothing,” Harry bit his lip and Louis pressed the button to start the suction.  

At first it didn’t feel like much at all.  He tucked his chin down and looked back and forth between his nipples through the clear plastic and could tell the suction wasn’t strong enough to even hold the weight of the empty plastic against his chest.  

“Does it go higher?” he asked and was quickly answered after Louis pressed one of the buttons several times.  Then he could see his nipples being gentled pulled like a heartbeat accompanied by a small rush of excitement.  It gentle tug was oddly pleasant and he wondered if he should feel weird that he was half hard in his jeans.

“Does it hurt?” Louis was zeroed in on his nipples as he licked his lips unconsciously.  

“Kind of feels good actually.  Is it supposed to feel good?” He looked back down and noted how his nipples had puckered up and grown hard.  He really had always been a fan of nipple play.

Louis reached over to increase the suction and Harry jumped at the stronger sensation.  It pulled his nipples further in and now looked more like he imagined a woman’s might.

“Does it say how long I’m supposed to do this?”

“I highly doubt it has instructions on how long a man is supposed to use it for an experiment.”  Louis rolled his eyes but picked up the manual again. “It says it may take ten to fifteen minutes to collect milk from both sides so maybe that long?”

He shrugged and pulled out his phone to look at the time.  Harry looked back down at his nipples. It still didn’t hurt and just felt really weird.  The pulsing sucked his nipple in and he tried to imagine what it might feel like to actually be expressing milk.  He wasn’t sure what to expect and grabbed his phone to make a note to add personal experiences to his research. Maybe if he could envision it, it would be more likely to happen.  

It probably wasn’t going to happen, but he was still determined to see the experiment through.  

After a few more minutes, he _almost_ started to get used to the feeling.  It helped to focus his attention on the tv but he couldn’t help laughing over the absurdity of it all.  Still, he decided to go all in and forced himself to endure a full thirty minutes for his first session.  

His nipples felt puffy and sensitive, but he considered the first day a success.  He made himself a cup of Milkmaid tea and curled up to spend the rest of his Friday night as they usually did.  

 

—

 

Harry felt like he’d just fallen asleep when the alarm on his phone started to go off.  Louis swore and mumbled in his sleep before he rolled over and Harry just groaned.

The research he’d done while they watched tv and chatted about the experiment suggested that pumping every three hours was a good place for women to start when trying to induce lactation.  Louis thought that might be extreme while Harry had argued that to give it a serious try, he had to be extreme.

He’d sat through another session just before heading to bed and set his alarm for four hours later — it was his first day, he figured that was okay.  

With his eyes burning, he stumbled like a zombie to the couch using only the light from the street filtering through the window to find his way.  He turned on the suction and it took a few tries to position the cups right on his nipples in the dark. Even with the pull on his skin, he thought he could probably fall asleep right where he sat.  He almost did.

When his alarm went off again, the dim light of dawn was just cresting over the horizon.  He turned on the pump and stared at the deep pink edge of the sky in a trance. Maybe he was still half asleep, but he thought the sight would only be made more beautiful by his own baby at his breast.  

He fell asleep again thinking he was pregnant.  

 

—

 

Louis left for the restaurant early in the afternoon and Harry sat down to continue his research.  Managing the bar, Louis had a lot of late nights and weekend hours and, for once, Harry was relieved to have some solitude.  As supportive as Louis seemed to be with his experiment after getting used to the idea, Harry needed some time alone to process what he was getting himself into.  

His nipples had started to feel a little tender but he still held them to his chest every three hours in the schedule he’d committed to.  He swallowed down some supplements, made himself some more of the specialty tea, and made a list of foods thought to encourage the production of prolactin.  

Quickly deciding against attempting the use of hormone treatments, Harry sat back from his laptop and realized that inorder to make this work, he needed to figure out what he wanted to get out of the experience personally.  This wasn’t just some “I Stopped Washing My Hair And Here’s What Happened” experiment for an article. They’d all tried stupid or silly products from advertisers and sponsors and suffered through the latest trendy diets. Harry was no stranger to being a guinea pig for clicks, but this was different.  This was something that could potentially be life changing if it worked.

He looked down at his puffy nipples and the reality really started to set in.  It had only been twenty-four hours and already his body was changing. Of course his slightly swollen nipples were just a temporary side effect, but it might not be if he continued.  

Gingerly circling his nipple with a fingertip, the heightened sensitivity was obvious.  Continuing the pumping schedule had the potential of making that worse or dulling his sensation all together.  There weren't any case studies about men using breast pumps to compare himself to.

Harry liked his body.  He liked working out and he liked how he looked with his lean muscles and subtle strength.  Immediately ruling out the use of any hormones had been easy. He wasn’t looking to transition his body into something it wasn’t already.  His experiment wasn’t a quest to grow breasts or take on a more womanly shape. It was simply to see if it was possible. Being realistic, producing milk had the potential of giving him more defined breasts.  The milk being produced had to go somewhere and his body would change to accommodate that. If that happened, it was always possible it would be temporary, but there was also a chance that it wouldn’t be. Continuing would mean that he’d have to accept that he might always have the appearance of breasts.  

He cupped his hand under his nipple and then gently squeezed what meat he could.  That idea wasn’t as off-putting as he thought it might be. Even though he’d never felt the dysmorphia to want the body of a woman in exchange for his own, he’d often wished he had the ability to carry a child of his own.  The trade off of breasts for the ability to breastfeed a baby of his own in the future seemed like a compromise he was willing to make. It felt natural when he thought about it that way.

Then there was Louis.  Beautiful, patient, and understanding Louis.  Harry loved him and could already see their future stretching out well beyond this experiment.  Harry would never let someone else’s opinion of his body influence him into changing it, but at the same time, Louis would be a big part of this change as well.  With Louis already sleeping over at least half the nights in a week, they were practically living together. Getting up every three hours would affect him, too.

Aside from that, if Harry actually did start producing milk, it could have an affect on their sex life.  Louis had only just realized and accepted he was gay just over a year ago. Having repressed his sexuality for so long, a breast full of milk in his face might not be something he would want any part of.  An article wasn’t worth putting unnecessary strain on the best relationship Harry had ever been in.

Harry had also stumbled upon mentions of loss of libido as a side effect of high levels of prolactin.  He figured it would be highly unlikely for his levels to spike high enough for this to affect him, but it also wasn’t a heavily researched topic for his situation.  Just as in taking a medication, Harry figured that would be easily remedied. His sex life with Louis was fairly regular and consistent. He would surely notice if he had any changes in desire and be able to change his habits to get it back.  

He settled into the couch with his feet up and his eyes closed and let everything bounce around in his head.  

Taking only himself into consideration, he decided he’d be lying if he said the experiment and the possible outcome didn’t turn him on at least a little.  Letting himself truly think about it, it turned him on a lot. Even with his tender nipples, the suction on his nipples still went straight to his dick when he wasn’t distracting himself with the tv or his laptop.  Imagining that he could feel himself swollen with milk and then the sensation of squeezing it out also caused his body to tingle.

He reached down to pull himself out of his shorts and stroked a few times before finally he gave zero fucks about what he was about to do.  

He sat up and positioned the pump against his nipples.  He was already getting the hang of positioning them correctly and moaned when suction pulled them in and milked his sensitive flesh.  The meat around his nipple felt dully bruised but added to the sensation.

Once he let himself indulge in the feeling now that he was alone, he felt ready to come in an instant.  In reality it took just a bit longer than that but was still as strong and intense as he’d expected it to be.  It left him breathless as the pumps still sucked away.

He’d still talk to Louis, but his own personal gained was now very clear.  

 

—

 

Harry tried to laugh along with his coworkers on his way to his desk on Monday morning.  The breast pump had included a convenient storage bag that also drew attention to what it was as he carried it over his shoulder with his laptop bag.  What had been a fun joke of an idea on Friday had become steadily more intimate and personal over the weekend.

The knowing looks drew his attention to the way his sore nipples rubbed against his shirt and the fact that _everyone knew_ what he’d been doing all weekend.  Of course they didn’t know the details and his moments of crisis, but they soon would.  That was the whole point of the diary and article. It was just very clear Harry wasn’t quite ready or prepared to share any of that yet.  

His alarm went off mid-morning and he instantly realized he hadn’t thought this through.  While the open floor plan of their desks and cubicles was great for sharing ideas and creating a fun and communal work environment, it also meant he had zero privacy to unbutton his shirt and hold breast pumps to his chest while the sound drew everyone’s attention to him.  

He hooked the bag over his shoulder and headed out towards the bathrooms.  There was a breastfeeding room that was located between the bathroom doors and he hesitated in front of it.  It wasn’t his space, he knew that, but it would also be easy to jump up if any mothers actually needed it for its intended purpose.  

His hand rested against the door and then started to push it open.  It only cracked an inch before he could tell it was in use.

“Sorry!  I’m sorry!” he apologized and backed away, his face red.

So that wasn’t an option.  He quickly passed the men’s room as well.  The last thing he wanted was to be caught in a stall while the sounds were amplified by the tile of the small room.  Anyone entering would surely think he was some type of perv or who knows what masturbating at work.

Almost resorting to leaving the building entirely, he paused by the door of the supply closet and considered his options.  With nearly all of their work being digital, the supply closet wasn’t visited as frequently as it would have been in another era.  With a quick glance down the hallway, he slipped inside and turned on the light. It was dim but not too dirty with shelves full of office supplies lining the walls.  

There were a few old desk chairs and he rolled one into the corner closest to the outlet and took a seat.  

There shouldn’t have been anything embarrassing about what he was doing, yet his face burned and a strange, irrational shame settled in him as he hid away.  He could never know what it was actually like to be a nursing mother, but had a new found empathy if they felt even a fraction of what he was feeling. He was glad that the women in his building had a nice room to feel comfortable in at least.

Sitting upright, he found that the suction didn’t keep the cups on his chest as easily as they had when he’d been slouching down on the couch.  He looked around and wondered if he could somehow tape them to his chest or if they sold some type of adhesive for them.

Holding them against his chest with one arm, he pulled out his phone and started searching.  The most common solution appeared to be different kinds of bras made specifically for the pumps.  He chewed on his bottom lip as he looked through the options and started the internal debate over how far he was going to take this experiment.  Purchasing a bra to hold his breast pumps felt like a big commitment.

He shook his head and huffed out a laugh at how ridiculous that thought was.  Any one thing he’d done since and including buying the breast pump on Friday had been a higher level of commitment than adding an accessory for convenience.  

Scrolling through the pictures, he found one that was strapless with a zipper up the middle.  He decided that one would be the easiest to slip on and off while he was trying to keep this up at work.  With that, he might be able to bring his laptop with him and maybe get at least a little work done for what would probably amount to over an hour each day.  Pumping breaks could technically be considered work related, but he wasn’t sure everyone in the office would feel that way.

He searched for a store that might carry that kind and bookmarked it so he could stop off on his way home.  He just hoped he could find someone who wouldn’t judge him as he slipped into the changing room to find a bra size that would fit him.  That was something he really wasn’t prepared for.

 

—

 

It was Wednesday before Louis was back at Harry’s for the night.  They had a routine of phone calls and spending lunch together when their schedules conflicted, but Harry always loved the nights they shared.  

Their takeout containers were empty on the coffee table and their latest series binge was queued up on Netflix.  Harry wanted to relax with his boyfriend for a while before he brought up the experiment but he would have to pump at some point soon if he wanted to keep his schedule.  

Keeping up the every three hours pledge hadn’t been as difficult to keep as he originally thought.  It wasn’t sustainable long term, but he’d been able to make it work. Using the pump around 8 times each day on pump-virgin nipples, however, was the problem.  They were puffy and sore and everything within the circumference of the flange felt bruised and tender.

Under the guise of asking for his wife, Harry had gone into three different specialty shops and had received different balms and ointments they all swore were the best.  

He sat up from where he was positioned between Louis’ legs leaning back against his chest and grabbed one of the tubes from his collection of supplies.  He pulled off his tshirt and squeezed a small amount onto his fingertips and dabbed it around his nipple before he started to rub it in.

“What do you have there?”

Louis’ voice startled him out of his own little world and he even jumped just a bit.  

“Boobie cream,” he replied with a small giggle and showed Louis the tube.  “It’s specifically for women who pump and is supposed to encourage production or something.”  

He squeezed some more out and started to do the same on the other side.  

“Come here with that.”  

Louis tapped his chest and sat up a little against the throw pillows.  Harry did as he was told, but a little hesitantly. He knew the whole experiment was still a little weird and had been in his own world with it for a few days now.  

“Put your arms up around my neck,” Louis instructed and guided him until they were comfortable.  Harry felt a little awkward with his arms raised and knew he wouldn’t be able to stay like that for an extended amount of time but also wanted to see what Louis was trying to do.   

Harry gasped when the shock of cold hit his sensitive nipples.  He looked down and watched as Louis spread a generous amount over each swollen mound with delicate touches.  It felt so strange and good that he moaned when Louis’ fingers made a second pass.

“Feel good?” Louis asked and slid his whole hands over his abused breasts.  Harry nodded and let his eyes fall shut as Louis continued the gentle massage.  

His hands slid smoothly and started from the sides of Harry’s chest to come up and over the small swollen handfuls he had become over the past few days.  It felt so good to be fondled in such a way and his own fingers slid up into Louis’ hair for something to ground himself with.

“Still committed to this?” Louis asked softly while he massaged Harry’s chest.  

It felt so good that Harry could hardly form a sentence.  “Yeah, wanted to talk to you about it.”

“What about it?”

Harry didn’t want him to stop but it was difficult to think.  He lowered his arms and placed his hands over Louis’ to still them.  They stayed splayed over his swollen nipples while Harry tilted his head up.  

“We’ve been together for a while now and I think we’re on the same page with where this relationship is going.”  Harry paused and looked up. He could see up Louis’ nose and that probably diminished the seriousness of the conversation but Louis still nodded in agreement.  “I’ve been thinking about what the next two months might bring if I continue this and I wanted to make sure that you were okay with everything.”

“What, the sound of a breast pump and getting to devote so much time to your nipples?”  

Louis smirked and Harry couldn’t help but snort out a laugh.  

“I’m being serious!” he chuckled and tried to school his expression, “If this ends up working, I might end up with actual breasts or something.”

“Yeah, two nice handfuls,” Louis grinned and squeezed his pecs where his hands were still resting.  

“Stoppp,” Harry whined but laughed.  “I’m trying to have a serious discussion!”  

“Look.  As long as you want to do this and you aren’t being forced by your job, I don’t really care what happens.  Your job is weird and I actually like that it makes my life more interesting. Plus, if I was going to leave you over something I would have done it when you let me kiss you _before_ you told me you’d just had a bird poo facial.”  

Harry honked out a laugh and then reached up to pull his wonderful boyfriend down for a kiss.  

“I love you,” he grinned up at him and repositioned Louis’ hands on his chest.  “Now keep doing that. It feels good.”

Louis shook his head with a laugh and continued with his massage.  

 

—

 

Two weeks in and Harry was already getting impatient.  His extensive research of induced lactation consistently came up with a minimum time frame of two months,  but pumping was time consuming and Harry was feeling particularly moody.

Louis kept telling him it was just his interrupted sleep pattern.  Deep down he knew that to be true yet wouldn’t admit it.

Instead, he took himself down to the specialty health food store where everything was insanely overpriced and most of it was probably just left over bulk processed food they repackaged to make rich people feel superior.  

He knew that probably wasn’t entirely true, but Louis always liked to poke fun at him for buying organic and it was an easy opinion to be pissy over when he wanted to be cranky.  

He really didn’t _want_ to be cranky.  He just had to work it out of his system somehow.  

Standing in the baby aisle, he shook his head at the amount of products he’d never known existed.  They contained both the trendy and proven foods and supplements he’d found on about every mommy blog and parenting site, though, so he was glad there was a variety.  

In contrast to the selection of powerbars and teas at the baby store, he was standing in front of a mini grocery store of actually palatable – he hoped, anyway – food options.  Soon his small cart was piled high with cookies, brownies, smoothie mixes, infused cooking oils, pasta, breakfast mixes, organic oats, organic quinoa — anything that looked even remotely appealing.  Words that Harry had grown familiar with were printed over the boxes in bright letters with exclamation points and he hoped that for once he could trust the marketing.

He left the store with a small fortune worth of food and nearly stomped the entire way home in frustration.  

 

—

 

“What’s with all the sweets?” Louis said through a bite of oatmeal cookie he’d swiped from Harry’s plate as soon as he’d entered the kitchen.  

Harry frowned and took his plate around to the sink.  “What do you mean? I always eat sweets.”

“You always bake your sweets, though.  I’ve rarely seen you buy any and suddenly your cabinets are full.  I mean, I’m not complaining.” Louis shrugged and shoved the rest of the cookie into his mouth.  “What are these? They’re pretty good.”

Louis picked up the package Harry pushed across the counter.  Harry only looked up when it sounded like Louis choked almost choked and stood coughing for a moment until his eyes were red.  

“You okay?”

“Seriously, Harry?” Louis held up the lactation cookies, “Don’t you think you might be taking this a little too far?  Everything in your apartment says lactation something or other.”

“Calm down, it’s not like you’re suddenly going to start shooting milk out of your nipples.  Obviously.” Harry gestured at himself with an eye roll that made them ache for a moment. He turned away and started to rinse his plate off.  

Warm arms wrapped around his middle and then Louis body was plastered comfortably against his back.  He relaxed against the touch, he couldn’t help it.

“Hey, no.  That’s not what I meant at all.”  Louis rested his cheek between Harry’s shoulder blades and his firm hold was grounding.  “You’ve just been so stressed and unhappy. Maybe you need to take it down a notch if it’s making you so miserable.”  

“You want me to quit?” Harry asked softly as he stared out the window above the sink at the brick wall of the building next door that was too close for any other view.  

“I don’t want you to do anything but be happy… and maybe re-evaluate.”  Louis’ hands found their way under Harry’s shirt and slid up until they covered his puffy nipples.  “It’s been about a month?”

He waited for Harry to nod and his fingers started to move in a massage that made Harry start to melt back against him.  

“I know you’re frustrated, but it really hasn’t been that long.  And I don’t know if you’ve noticed the little changes, but I have.”

“What changes?” Harry asked in a whisper.  He wasn’t sure why.

Louis released him enough to pull Harry’s shirt over his head and turn him so he was pinned against the counter face to face.  He ran a gentle finger down Harry’s sternum and then followed it with soft kisses.

“Your nipples are a shade darker to start with,” Louis’ lips got closer until Harry could feel his breath against the nubs.  “And they’re bigger.”

Harry moaned when Louis finally wrapped his lips around his areola and gave a gentle suck.  

“Oh fuck,” Harry gasped and threaded his fingers into Louis’ hair.  

Louis trailed kisses across to his other nipple and sucked it in while his hand came up to cup the small swell of his breast.  

“And I can tell you aren’t just swollen anymore.  There’s something else going on in there.”

Harry gasped again when Louis began to actually suck at his nipple and was instantly hard in his shorts.  He reached down and started jerking himself when it quickly became too intense.

With all the massages and fondling and everything else, Louis had yet to show his nipples full attention since the whole thing had started and it was an overwhelming sensation to his abused nipples.  He came in his pants embarrassingly quickly and slumped against the counter with his chest heaving.

“Want to move to the recliner?” Louis released his nipple and nodded his head towards the living room.  Harry agreed quickly and allowed Louis to lead him there after cleaning his shorts up the best he could.  He giggled as Louis put his feet up and leaned the chair back, handed him the remove and then crawled in beside him.  

“Remember the thing said you’re supposed to stay comfortable and relaxed?  It’s never going to happen if you keep stomping around like someone pissed in your cereal.”  

Harry grinned and had to agree. He wasn’t sure what it was that had him in such a bad mood, but Louis was right.  If he took this serious enough to be so frustrated, it probably really wouldn’t happen.

“So pick something on tv and relax.”  

Harry raised the remote and almost dropped it again when Louis’ lips attached to his nipple.

“What are you doing?” he squeaked in surprise.  

“It’s all about stimulation, right?” Louis grinned up at him before swirling his tongue around the hard nub.  

“Jesus,” Harry breathed and watched him latch on.  He couldn’t deny it felt phenomenally better than the pull of the breast pump and he didn’t want Louis to stop.  He didn’t even want the distraction of the tv and sank into the chair with his eyes closed just to feel it.

Louis’ lips were soft and his whole mouth felt like a pillowy dream around his nipple compared to what he had grown used to.  His tongue was just the right amount of pressure as he sucked with more intent while his fingers teased Harry’s other nipple with gentle tugs.  

“Do you think a real mouth triggers a better reaction?” Louis asked curiously.  

“I don’t know,” he shrugged and cracked his eyes open to look down at him, “It just feels really good.”  

“Do you think it would feel good if you actually did have milk?”

“Probably.  I’ve read a lot about a lot of women getting turned on by it and it wouldn’t just stop feeling good just because there’s milk.”  

Harry tried to sound casual and not admit that he’d jerked off to the thought more than once while the pump pulled at his nipples.  He wasn’t sure why it sounded so erotic.

“If it works, would you let me…?” Louis chewed on his bottom lip while he waited for Harry to answer.  

“You’d want to?” he asked, surprised.  He was sure his brows reached his hairline.  

“I keep thinking about it.  I never thought it was something I was into, but with you and with this, I keep thinking about it.”

“Me too,” Harry admitted after Louis had returned to his nipple.  “It’s not a thing for me in general, but here and now when it’s me?  When it’s you?”

Harry swallowed hard and slid his fingers into Louis’ hair and watched his mouth work against his chest.  

“So you think I should keep trying?” he asked.  

Louis didn’t break his sucking rhythm but looked up from beneath his eyelashes.  His answer was right there.

 

—

 

Harry was tucked away in the corner of the supply closet the first time he felt that something was off.  

Sneaking off to use the breast pump at the office had become so routine that he’d even brought a little table in so he could easily continue to work.  He could zip up the corset-type bra and wiggle it up into place without much thought while he continued to read an article or watch an interview on his laptop screen.  

It was a Monday morning with eleven days left of his official experiment when he started to slide the cups into place and suddenly winced with pain.  At first he thought that his skin had been pinched between the cup and the tight bra and went to slide it into place again. Again he winced and hissed out a curse.  

He unzipped the corset and looked down at his right nipple where the pain had been.  There were no visible marks or redness that he could immediately see. The lighting was dark in the closet though and he swiveled the chair to face the single bulb.  

His fingers pressed along what could now be defined as one of his small breasts and clenched his teeth when he found the source.  There was a tender lump just below his nipple that was only a little sore when gently pressed and more painful when approached from another angle.  He explored it for a minute before opening a browser for a search.

He pulled nervously at his lip while thoughts of breast cancer and cysts and worst case scenarios flooded his head.  His fingers moved back to prod at it while his heart raced. It would be so embarrassing to explain to a doctor what he had been doing if it turned out to be serious.  

Internet searches brought up lumpy clogged milk ducts in later stages of pregnancy.  Suggestions included warm water or a warm cloth which he couldn’t easily try at work.  He was too anxious to get any work done until he was sure it wasn’t serious and packed up his pump and laptop and headed for his apartment.  

Louis was just waking up when Harry burst through his apartment door.  Working a closing shift the night before, it had been after three in the morning when Louis had joined Harry in bed.  

“Everything okay?” Louis’ sleepy voice croaked when Harry went straight for the bathroom.  

He ran the sink until the water was hot and nearly scalded his fingers as he soaked a washcloth and then wrung it out.  Louis was sitting up when Harry returned and flopped down onto the bed beside him and started to unbutton his shirt.

“Either this might really be happening or I’m dying.”  He reached the last button and pulled the shirt open to leave his chest exposed.  “This bump showed up and it hurts.”

Harry walked his fingers over the spot again and held the hot washcloth in his other hand.  Louis’ joined his after a moment and Harry let him take over the examination. Harry winced and then realized it wasn’t nearly as bad as he’d initially thought.

“I’ve been doing research too and I think you’re fine.”  Louis leaned down to give him a soft kiss and a gentle smile.  Harry cover the area with the warm washcloth and took a few calming breaths.  

Louis snuggled back in beside him, still warm from sleep.  

“I can’t believe it might be working,” Louis said with a small laugh of disbelief.  Harry let out his own chuckle and then both of them dissolved into laughter until tears gathered in their eyes.

“This is so bizarre.  How did I even end up getting this far?”  Harry laughed and wiped at the corners of his eyes.  

“Because you’re a ridiculous human and I love you.”  Louis grinned and leaned down to give him a soft kiss before his lips journeyed down to his nipple.  

 

—

 

The tender lump flattened out and became more of a dull ache when touched.  That could have lingered because Harry couldn’t stop messing with it, fingers pressing along his nipple while he lost himself in thought.  More than once he’d been caught feeling himself up at his desk while he re-read through one of his pieces or thought about rewording an email.  

He couldn’t help that his nipples and related activities had become somewhat of an obsession over the past two months.  One more day left of the official experiment and he was disappointed that with all the work and even with all the changes of his body, he still had yet to produce even a drop.  

The diary of his experiences had been chopped up and edited into a format ready to be published and the notes for his official article were ready to go.  

There had been a strange feeling of sadness descending up on him in the days approaching the end date.  He could equate it to the way one might feel on the last day of a long vacation – not ready to give it up yet ready to sleep in a familiar bed.  

Two months was such a short amount of time when he thought of his life on earth yet it seemed like years with the dedication he’d had for his trial.  The pull of his nipples and the gentle ache had grown to be a comforting feeling to him as was the treat of having Louis’ mouth suck and tease. He wasn’t sure that part would ever leave him.  He wasn’t ready to give it up.

The last night and Harry relaxed comfortably between Louis’ thighs, reclined with his back against Louis’ chest.  His arms stretched above his head played with short hair on the back of Louis’ head while Louis’ hands massaged his beasts.    

“Gonna miss this,” Harry mumbled lazily accompanied by a content but sad sigh.  Louis’ hands paused.

“You know that nothing says you have to stop tomorrow if you don’t want to.”  

Harry looked up at him and studied Louis’ upside down face from his vantage point while he pondered that suggestion.  He wasn’t sure why he’d never considered that to be an option. Obviously it was. There wasn’t anything stopping him from doing it.  No one would even have to know he still was.

“You think I should?”

Louis’ hands continued to knead.  “I think you should if you want to.  It’s kind of become something really intimate between us so I wouldn’t exactly be upset if you decided you wanted to keep going.”  

Harry took a moment to evaluate their current position.  Louis was right. Of course he knew Louis was right. He just hadn’t taken the time to think of it like that.  It had become a very personal and intimate experience from the beginning, but he hadn’t considered it was the same on Louis’ side.  It was obvious now that it always had been. That’s why it had become so comforting. However strange, it had become a bonding ritual.  Louis had been staying at Harry’s apartment instead of his own every single night for the past month and helping with the experiment had been used by both of them for an excuse.    

“Plus, I think you’re really close to actually doing it.”  

“You think?” Harry’s voice was a bit distorted as he tucked his chin in to look down at his chest.  

“Yeah.  I’m pretty sure these are milk ducts,” he started to press and then slide along a line from Harry’s nipple towards his armpit.  Harry’s fingers followed. “Those weren’t there when you started.”

Harry _could_ feel them.  The changes had been so subtle over time that he hadn’t even realized that’s what they were.  He had just assumed it was more swelling. His whole chest had felt varying levels of tender since the first day, but since Louis pointed it out, it did feel different.  

“Holy shit,” he whispered in awe and wondered if it really was happening.  Louis’ thumb and the forefinger pulled down in a pinched milking motion towards his nipple.  It felt so oddly good that Harry moaned. It was as if the sore aching feeling he’d been experiencing was temporarily relieved when Louis applied pressure and pulled.  It hurt so good.

Louis dipped his fingers into one of the pots of cream Harry had brought home and then repeated the same motion with an easier slide.  He felt like a cow being milked in slow motion but had long since stopped feeling weird about that. He could feel that Louis was hard against his back from doing it to him so he figured there was no reason to hide his reaction.  

In a million years Harry would have never dreamed of stumbling upon such an odd kink on his own let alone someone to share it with.  What a warped path of fate.

“Move in with me,” Harry said on a breathy moan as both of Louis’ hands pulled down on his nipples.  They paused with Harry’s nipples pinched and stretched. Harry whimpered.

“Okay,” Louis responded simply and then squeezed the meat in his hands.  Harry groaned.

“Let’s go to bed.” Louis growled hungrily in his ear.

Harry didn’t have to be told twice and they pulled off each other’s clothing as they stumbled along the short hallway.  They were both naked by the time they fell on the bed in a messy, uncoordinated kiss. Everything was a rush of hands and lube and moans until Louis had Harry on his hands and knees, ready to be taken.  Harry was so ready for it. He’d been half hard since Louis had lustfully watched him latch the pump onto his nipples.

They were so good together– had been from their very first time.  He’d never had a partner able to read him so well during sex and now seemed to know him better than he knew himself.  

He entered Harry with a slow pressing drag that pushed a long moan from his throat.  He knew Louis had been hard just as long as he had and he could tell. Bottomed out, the warmth of Louis’ body draped over his back as his hands slid up his sides and then around to hold his breasts the same way he had on the couch.  It felt different with the force of gravity and goosebumps prickled over his body.

Time and motion slowed like the ooze of molasses, Louis’ slow deep grind and the squeeze of his hands.  

“I get hard thinking about doing this at work,” Louis’ voice was low and intense against Harry’s ear.  “Milking you just like this until it’s dripping off your nipples.”

Harry groaned and dropped his head down, his body struggling between wanting to push back against him or focus on his chest.  Louis had him caged in enough that he couldn’t go far either way. The cream Louis had been rubbing into his skin was still thick enough to provide a good slide as Louis’ hands alternated between massaging squeezes and deliberate milking motions.  Each made Harry’s cock feel heavier between his legs.

“Or maybe you’d rather sit on my dick while I suck you dry.”

Harry’s whole body shuddered.  He wanted to feel that so badly.  In the meantime, Louis already knew exactly how to rile them up and get them off.  By the time they were both spent, Harry’s nipples were aching and red and more swollen than he had seen them yet.  Louis gave them each gentle kisses goodnight and then held them protectively as they fell asleep.

 

— Two Weeks Later —

 

“Harry, your phone keeps going off,” Louis mumbled sleepily and sniffs as he tucks himself closer against his back.  

It was publication day and Harry had forgotten to silence his phone before bed.  He had kept his experiment and article from his friends and family who were no doubt waking up to some very interesting information about him plastered all over the internet.  He’d taken the day off just to hide from the initial reaction. Good or bad, it was bound to cause at least a few waves.

 _Challenging Nature: A Look Into Male Lactation_ had gone live at six and his edited journal entries would be published at nine.  By ten it will have reached the far corners of the world.

“Turn it off,” Harry murmured with his face still smashed against his pillow.  

“You’re closer.”  

Louis started to wiggle around behind him, snuggling up closer and trying to hang on to the last moments of sleep.  He squeezed Harry closer to him as he did, hands sliding up his sleep-warm skin until he froze, rigid against Harry’s back.  

“What?” Harry mumbled as his phone buzzed on the nightstand again.  

He was suddenly on his back and cracked his eyes open in startled confusion and blinked to bring everything into focus.  Even before they did, he could see the look of shock on Louis’ face.

“What?” Harry started to get anxious that he was covered in a rash or being overtaken by ants or something equally as alarming.  He started to prop himself up on his elbows when Louis placed his hand in the center of his chest to stop him.

The hand that Louis had been holding up lowered and slid up until it was cupping Harry’s swollen breast.  It felt abnormally uncomfortable and he winced when Louis squeezed.

“Holy shit,” Louis whispered out, his eyes wide and focused.  

“What??” Harry tucked his chin down and followed Louis gaze until—

Holy shit.  

On the tip of his nipple was a bead of hazy liquid.  He watched it roll off the tip and pool in the v of Louis’ thumb still cupped in a gentle squeeze.  

“Oh my god,” Louis whispered again.  He had to squeeze harder to get anything out the second time, but there was no question where the liquid had come from.  They both watched it seep out of his body in shock and awe.

“You really did it,” Louis said in disbelief, eyes yet to move away from his dark pink nipple.

Harry couldn’t believe it either.  It had been over a week since he’d stopped getting up overnight for the pumping schedule he’d started.  He hadn’t given up but also hadn’t been as dedicated thinking it was a lost cause.

Louis leaned down and wrapped his soft lips around his nipple.  Harry was instantly hard. His fingers threaded into Louis’ hair and gripped as he felt Louis suck hard, his nipple pulled deep and pressed against his tongue.  

“Holy fuck,” Harry arched up to meet him.  It felt so amazingly good. It was similar to how Louis had been suckling on him over the past weeks, but there was a strange pull that hadn’t been there before so subtle that he couldn’t describe it.  

“It’s sweet,” Louis finally looked up and met Harry’s eyes with pupils blown.

“Milk me,” Harry responded immediately, so turned on he was squirming.  

Louis’ lips reattached and Harry couldn’t control himself.  He rutted up against Louis’ thigh and pulled at his hair while a stream of moans came out between heavy breaths.  

In what could have been minutes or even seconds, Harry was coming against Louis’ thigh and he had never been more thankful they had fallen asleep naked.  Louis had lifted his head and they both stared at each other for a few moments before Harry realized that Louis had come too.

“Holy shit,” Harry mumbled and then glanced down at his puffy nipple.  “Did you get any??”

“Only a few drops maybe,” Louis swiped a thumb over the corner of his mouth as a grin spread, “But yeah.”

Harry started to grin as well, giddy excitement swelling up until they were both actually giggling together.  The shock, the arousal, the adrenaline– they all melted away to the absolute ridiculousness of the situation and they were reduced to immature school boys hiding their grins behind their hands.  It felt good to laugh and it felt good to see his own happiness reflected back at him in Louis’ eyes.

“I can’t believe it actually worked,” Louis got out through his laughter as Harry wiped the corners of his eyes.  

“I know.  What the fuck!”  

Harry brought his own hand up to squeeze, only able to get a tiny dot to appear.  He moved to the other side and attempted to do the same. Nothing came out but he was just as tender so assumed it would be soon.

“Do you think it will be like… a lot?” he asked, both hands cupping himself, “Or only like that?”

“I don’t know?  Probably more if you keep doing it?” Louis shrugged and settled in so he could be close enough to press soft kisses around his nipples.  “Did it feel good?” he asked as the veil of lust dropped over his face again.

“Yeah,” Harry nodded feeling suddenly breathless as he watched Louis’ lips wrap around his nipple again.  He squeezed the meat of his breast under Louis’ mouth and hissed when he received a playful bite.

Louis smirked and quirked a playful brow.  “I wouldn’t mind if you made more. I bet it would feel good for me to suck you dry.”  

Harry moaned.  He could already imagine what it would feel like to be heavy with milk with only Louis allowed to relieve the pressure.  His dick was already interested in that game.

“Bet you’ll beg for it when I come home late to find you leaking all over yourself, all spread out for me like dessert.”  

Harry gripped his hair with one hand and massaged his breast with the other.  

“Feels so good.  Can’t wait for you to nurse.”  

Louis sucked his nipple down again and his whole body was thrumming with excitement.  

“Does this make your article wrong now?  Are you going to write a follow up?” Louis asked, resting his chin on Harry’s chest to look up at him.  

“No, I want this to be just for us,” Harry said and in some ways was glad that it hadn’t worked out in his original timeline. He didn’t want to share it with the rest of the world.  When Louis latched on for real, Harry didn’t want to be thinking about people outside the walls of his apartment wondering what was going on. This was for them.

“Good,” Louis nodded with a fond smile.  “Thank you for letting it be me.”

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

——Epilogue——

 

Harry laid on his back with his arms stretched wide above his head.  The cuffs circling his wrists were soft, but anything could get uncomfortable when he was writhing around as much as he was.  

Louis had left him tied up hours ago.  At least he thought it had been hours. It could have been five minutes but without a clock, Harry had no sense of time.  His whole body was in blissful agony and clouded any clear passage of time. He was hard against his stomach and trying to rub his thighs together gave him not even a hint of relief.  

Worse was the aching pressure and noticeable weight against his chest.  This was his punishment for not waiting for Louis the night before but would soon turn into the best reward.  He hadn’t been allowed to do anything about his heavy breasts all day and it was getting to be too much. Already his skin felt chilled where his milk had seeped and left his skin damp.  The more he moved, the worse it got, but Harry couldn’t just lie still.

At least he could hear Louis moving around the apartment now.  The silence had been torture with no indication of how long he’d be left to suffer.  

“I bet you’re getting pretty uncomfortable,” Louis smirked where he leaned against the door jam into their bedroom.  A whine was the only response Harry could give in his state, nodding as he tried to keep his body still.

Louis walked to the edge of the bed and shook his head.  “You’re making quite a mess of yourself,” Louis looked him over, arms crossed over his chest.  

Harry loved the embarrassment of Louis looking over his wrecked body while standing over him fully clothed.  His cock was hard and pooling precum near his navel and his milk had made sticky paths where the beads rolled across his skin and made it feel tight in the places it had dried.  A shower was going to feel so glorious after this.

“You’re really full today,” Louis commented and gently followed the curve of his breast beneath his nipple.  It made Harry moan and arch into the touch. “Held out all day long for me.”

Harry whined when Louis’ hand left his skin.  It was starting to become painful, milk bloating his skin enough to show lines of blue veins.  Louis returned his hand and squeezed, a gasp punching out of Harry as milk sprayed from his nipple and coated his chest with the spray.  It pooled along his sternum as Harry gasped for a few breaths. Both painful and relieving, everything was overwhelming.

Louis stepped back and slowly undressed.  He took his time folding his clothing for the first time since Harry had met him before he slowly crawled over Harry’s body.  

“Hi,” he said softly before giving Harry a slow kiss.  He reached down to take hold of Harry’s neglected dick and the first touch of the tip to Louis’ hole made it obvious Louis had prepared himself in the other room.  

Harry swore as Louis slowly sank down onto his length, not stopping until he was fully seated.  The wrist restraints held strong as Harry tugged against them. He was so on edge that he fought to pull away and thrust into Louis’ body at the same time.

Waiting until they had both calmed down, Louis guided Harry to tent his knees behind him.  It changed their position just enough for Louis to easily lean forward to reach Harry’s chest.  

He kept his hips still while he pressed his lips in teasing kisses around Harry’s leaking nipples.  It was all Harry could do to hold back, concentrating on his breathing to keep himself in control. Louis always made it a goal to push Harry to his breaking point and he was so good at doing it.  Every touch and tease was aimed to make Harry whimper and beg for it. It was a game Harry loved to hate. He’d pinch Louis’ bum in retaliation later.

Harry had lost track of the times he’d spontaneously come when Louis finally took his nipple into his mouth and sucked.  He’d be embarrassed about it if it didn’t feel so mind blowingly good. Determined this time would not be one of them, he bit down into his bottom lip and tensed when he saw Louis move close.  

His eyes fell shut and he moaned when it finally happened.  Louis’ mouth was always perfectly warm and wet and soft against his nipple.  It was a feeling he craved when he was heavy with milk and longed for when he resorted to pumping to relieve the pressure.  Louis worshiped his breasts and in every action, it showed.

Louis’ dedication was the biggest reason Harry still dealt with the cons that had reared their ugly faces once his milk had really taken off.  Though he did not produce as much as a nursing woman might, his normally muscular pecs had grown into full A cups that required him to go bra shopping.  It wasn’t constantly needed, but he found more and more situations where it was necessary, especially when his clothing would show when he leaked. Leaking was another issue he hadn’t taken into consideration.  He hadn’t realized how often this would happen. Usually it was easy for him to hide but there were many other inconveniences that came with lactating as well.

At the same time, Harry owned it.  He wasn’t ashamed of his body and learned that he didn’t owe anyone an explanation.  His partially opened button down shirts were still in his regular wardrobe rotation and even felt sexy with some curves of skin on display.  The hungry looks and touches from Louis were enough for him to love it. It also made it easier for them to sneak into the bathroom for a few minutes when they were out as well.  Letting Louis have a taste was always a battle with a bra or tshirt. Just pulling back a flap was much more convenient. Harry craved that bond between them, even with giggling quickies in bathroom stalls.  

He was sure all their friends thought they were frequently exchanging blowjobs when they consistently came back with blown pupils and flushed cheeks while Louis struggled to fix his hair and Harry straightened his shirt.  They always let them come to their own conclusions. Explaining what they’d actually been doing required more energy than either of them cared to expend.

There were many different moods and settings that Harry loved to experience with Louis.  Slow, sleepy suckles at night, distracted playful ones while they cuddled on the couch and watched tv.  There were times when Louis loved to suck him dry and others when he liked to milk him out by hand. Harry loved each one of them for different reasons, but his favourite by far was when Louis held out on him either making him wait or edging him until tears ran down his cheeks.  

Being tied to the bed unable to touch was one of those times.  

He squirmed to get his wrists free, needing to thread them into Louis’ hair and hold him in place.  It was the worst kind of tease for Louis to suck a long pull only to lift his head and grin as Harry whined for more.  He was so desperate that he wasn’t beyond shoving his nipple into Louis’ mouth and milking himself into it.

Louis bounced back and forth between his nipples with teasing suction until Harry was on the brink of crying from frustration.  He thrust his hips up against Louis in retaliation where he was buried deep and was rewarded with a whine before Louis clamped his thighs tight.  

“Okay, okay,” Louis grumbled but Harry knew it was just an act.  Louis got just as worked up from holding back. Harry could feel the evidence against his stomach.  

Harry arched up when Louis began to suck in earnest, milking his other side with a gripping handful.  He knew his mouth was moving, knew sounds were falling out, but couldn’t registered what he was mumbling or whining.  His senses were clouded by the sensations from his nipples and the tight grip around his cock. He moaned and bucked up into the feeling.  

Louis didn’t stop him and soon his wrists had more slack as he fucked them up towards the headboard.  He doubled his efforts when Louis moved his mouth to the other side, the softer empty side feeling like jiggled jello with his thrusts.  

“Louuuu,” Harry got out in a strangled moan when he teetered right on the brink.  Louis sucked hard and that was it. He came with a string of curses punctuated by Louis’ bite that made him jump.  

“Fucking asshole,” he murmured, hands restrained so he couldn’t swat his head.  It was probably why he’d done it.

Louis hand worked between them, knuckles brushing against Harry’s stomach with each rushed stroke.  It felt wet before Louis came and it took him a moment to realize he’d gathered the milk he’d expressed to rub over his cock.  

“What’s wrong with you?” Harry murmured with a lazy grin, exhausted after being kept on edge for so long.  

“I know what I like.”  Louis shrugged and made no move to pull away.  It felt good yet weird to slowly soften still inside Louis’ body but he liked it.  Louis was using slow drags of his tongue to clean up the mess on Harry’s chest. He’d never felt more content.  Except for one thing.

“Can you let me out?” Harry finally mumbled, twisting his sore wrists around.  

Louis smirked and reached up to rip the velco loose, bring each of Harry’s wrists up to give press gentle kisses to his pink skin.  

“That was just what I needed,” Harry finally slides his hands up to pull Louis down into a long kiss.  He could taste the sweet traces of himself on Louis’ lips and hummed in approval. “Thanks baby.”

“That was all you.  You’re perfect.”

They kissed lazily until their fluids started to stick them together.  Reluctantly they dragged themselves to the shower not even caring that they’d repeat the same thing in an hour.  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [here's a tumblr post!](https://jaerie.tumblr.com/post/185759862397/challenging-nature-a-look-into-male-lactation-e)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Challenging Nature: a timestamp - three years later.

Harry sat on the edge of the uncomfortable waiting room chair, fingers tucked under his thighs as he tried his best not to bounce in anticipation.  It had been over three years since Harry had pulled the first drops of milk from his nipples and in the time since, he had grown used to a certain schedule of pumping that his body followed like clock work.  Missing one session wasn’t the end of the world and he was used to dealing with some leakage, but it had been almost an entire day since he’d milked himself out and he wasn’t sure how much longer he could stand it.  

It wasn’t even the full heavy pressure that had him desperate to unload.  There was an anxiety that traveled through him when he was in a situation where he couldn’t that made him on edge.  He likened it to having to pee so badly that the threat of wetting himself was real. It was the same feeling.  

His body was used to his morning, noon and night routine, steadily producing to meet those times.  What made it worse was the weeks leading up to this exact moment when he’d increased to every few hours.  It made the urgency feel even stronger. It was all he could do to hold himself back from tugging Louis into the nearest closet and forcing his lips to bring some sweet relief.  

But that would be counterproductive.  He bit down on his lips and tried his best to suppress at least the physical manifestations of his anxiety.  

He looked up when he felt Louis’ warm hand on his thigh, a grounding touch that brought him back to himself for a moment.  

“You’re doing it again,” Louis said with a hint of amusement.  It was only then when Harry realized his knee had been bouncing, foot audibly hitting the floor.  

“Sorry,” Harry mumbled and forced himself to slouch down into the rigid seat.  “It’s just been so long.”  

“Won’t be long now, I’m sure.”  

Louis was the picture of nonchalance, an abused magazine open on his lap over his crossed leg.  Harry would be the only one to notice the press of his lips and clench of his jaw, the only signs that Louis was anxious as well.  

It was a big deal.  Somewhere just rooms away their new baby was in the process of being born and there were so many emotions swirling between them that it felt like a confusing hurricane hovering above them.  Were they prepared? Did they have everything they needed? Were they even ready for this??? 

Harry took a deep breath in and slowly let it out.  The generic white faced clock on the wall seemed to be broken with how slowly the black hands rotated.  

“Daddies?” 

Harry’s head snapped up to the nurse they’d met before while Louis straightened up beside him.  

“You’re up!” 

Harry’s legs nearly folded under him in his haist to stand like his body had forgotten how to walk.  The nurse chuckled as they rushed over and she let them into the maternity ward after checking their bracelets.  

She led them into a vacant room, both empty beds neatly made, and left them to fetch their newborn child.  It was so real now that they were moments away and Harry felt like his body was shaking as he made Louis wrap him in a hug for support.  

“This is it,” Louis mumbled and pressed a kiss against his neck.  

He kept his hand on Louis shoulder as the door opened for them to roll in the bed with clear plastic sides and it felt like his heart was about to explode from his chest.  

She was so tiny where she was wrapped up like a tight little burrito, a little hat pulled over her head so only her little red chubby face was sticking out.  He felt everything inside of him melting as she squirmed and fussed, the crease between her brows making her look like an angry kitten.  

“This is a unique experience so I’ll just try to guide you like we do with other new mothers,” the nurse said as she directed Harry to sit back on one of the raised beds in the room.  

His fingers were shaking as he unbuttoned the front of his shirt, the outfit choice made purposefully for this reason.  Louis was lifting their baby into his arms and he had to stop to take a few pictures of such an emotional moment.  

Her little angry cries filled the room as they loosened the blanket wrapped around her and passed her off into Harry’s waiting arms.  It was something Harry would never be able to describe, but the sound made him very aware of his heavy chest and his first instinct was to bring her close.  

The nurse fussed over them for a minute before they were in place, and in an instant, Harry’s entire life changed.  

He looked down and watched as her little lips parted and her tiny nose rooted around against his bare skin to find his nipple.  He let her search for it naturally, brushing off the nurses impatient attempts to help. Her tongue was searching and Harry’s heart skipped a beat when she found his nipple and immediately tried to latch on.  

It was a rush that made tears well in his eyes and he looked up at Louis with a watery smile as all their efforts were finally given a purpose.  Her mouth felt strong when she finally started to suck on instinct. He felt the rush of his milk dropping in response and gasped out a small laugh at the sensation.  It was something he’d experienced with Louis before, but never on such a scale nor so quickly.  

Though the physical act was the same, it was a completely new experience to be feeding their baby for the first time.  He was overwhelmed with emotion as he felt and watched her suck, so in awe of everything that had brought him here.  

“I never would have thought we’d be here,” Harry said with a small laugh to Louis who had perched himself on the edge of the bed against his thigh to observe.  

“Yet here we are,” he responded with a soft smile, his hand giving Harry’s thigh a gentle squeeze.  “You’ll finally have to write a follow up article.” 

“It was one of the conditions on being granted paternity leave,” Harry said with a laugh.  It was true that they’d joked about it in the office, but Harry knew he would want to eventually share this experience with the world.  He hoped it would open new doors and opportunities for other couples like them. It could be his legacy, however strange it might seem.  

But that would come later.  For now, these moments with his new family were just for them.  


End file.
